Wednesday, November 05, 2003 |
Childbirth from the Father’s perspective Part I
It is said that to give birth is similar to sucking a watermelon through a straw. Certainly having witnessed it twice, I would have to admit that it looks just as strikingly difficult and messy not to mention painful.
Little is mentioned however of the Father’s role in the whole process. Indeed while the Father has only a relatively brief physical contribution to the start of the process (some women would say all too brief), he is still very much involved in many other ways throughout the entire time.
Whilst I would never suggest that the Father would go through the sorts of physical pain, suffering and stress that the Mother obviously goes through, there are none the less a number of anxieties and traumas that a Father to be may go through during the pregnancy and finally the delivery.
For instance, you will witness a dramatic physical change in your wife during the term of the pregnancy that will see her start off like this;
Another unforseen and little talked about roller coaster ride is the actual “trying for a baby”. For most couples this phrase is very apt. All but the very lucky (or in some unfortunate circumstances the very unlucky) fall pregnant with a “Silver Bullet” within he first month of trying. It will usually take many months or in some cases years to fall pregnant.
I was visiting a mate one day who had gone through all of this twice already. When I told him that we were trying for a baby he said to me “Enjoy it while it lasts you lucky bastard”. We exchanged a knowing grin but little did I know that his was a little more knowing than mine.
Assuming that most readers have already learnt how to “make babies” from their parents, the school yard, personal experience or watching Video Hits of a Saturday morning, I will simply say that the process requires a lot of making. In fact with no kids around and the house to yourselves, you will be surprised how many times you will be hauled into the bedroom by your ovulating wife like a Stud Pony for a servicing.
And so it goes on until one day after a few mornings of copious vomiting, your wife brings you the news you have both been waiting for lo those many unprotected sex filled months. A swizzle stick lying in a cup of her urine says she is pregnant.
In the space of one day you will fall from the heady heights of your role as Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver. For she will need it. A woman’s body becomes a hormonal wreck after falling pregnant with the very last thing on her mind being “making babies”.
Undeniably the Father to be will be called upon to provide many comforts for her that range anywhere from a relaxing foot massage or back rub to convincing her that she is not becoming fat but rather radiantly pregnant no matter how large and unattractive her clothes have now become.
Whilst the Mother undoubtedly draws the worst feelings of despair, pain and suffering during her pregnancy, she also is able to experience all of the incredibly positive experiences as well. The feeling that another human being is growing inside you, being nurtured by you until it comes into the world. This feeling is denied to the Father as he watches from the sidelines, albeit very close to the action.
It is said that to give birth is similar to sucking a watermelon through a straw. Certainly having witnessed it twice, I would have to admit that it looks just as strikingly difficult and messy not to mention painful.
Little is mentioned however of the Father’s role in the whole process. Indeed while the Father has only a relatively brief physical contribution to the start of the process (some women would say all too brief), he is still very much involved in many other ways throughout the entire time.
Whilst I would never suggest that the Father would go through the sorts of physical pain, suffering and stress that the Mother obviously goes through, there are none the less a number of anxieties and traumas that a Father to be may go through during the pregnancy and finally the delivery.
For instance, you will witness a dramatic physical change in your wife during the term of the pregnancy that will see her start off like this;
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and finish off the process something like this
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Another unforseen and little talked about roller coaster ride is the actual “trying for a baby”. For most couples this phrase is very apt. All but the very lucky (or in some unfortunate circumstances the very unlucky) fall pregnant with a “Silver Bullet” within he first month of trying. It will usually take many months or in some cases years to fall pregnant.
I was visiting a mate one day who had gone through all of this twice already. When I told him that we were trying for a baby he said to me “Enjoy it while it lasts you lucky bastard”. We exchanged a knowing grin but little did I know that his was a little more knowing than mine.
Assuming that most readers have already learnt how to “make babies” from their parents, the school yard, personal experience or watching Video Hits of a Saturday morning, I will simply say that the process requires a lot of making. In fact with no kids around and the house to yourselves, you will be surprised how many times you will be hauled into the bedroom by your ovulating wife like a Stud Pony for a servicing.
And so it goes on until one day after a few mornings of copious vomiting, your wife brings you the news you have both been waiting for lo those many unprotected sex filled months. A swizzle stick lying in a cup of her urine says she is pregnant.
In the space of one day you will fall from the heady heights of your role as Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver. For she will need it. A woman’s body becomes a hormonal wreck after falling pregnant with the very last thing on her mind being “making babies”.
Undeniably the Father to be will be called upon to provide many comforts for her that range anywhere from a relaxing foot massage or back rub to convincing her that she is not becoming fat but rather radiantly pregnant no matter how large and unattractive her clothes have now become.
Whilst the Mother undoubtedly draws the worst feelings of despair, pain and suffering during her pregnancy, she also is able to experience all of the incredibly positive experiences as well. The feeling that another human being is growing inside you, being nurtured by you until it comes into the world. This feeling is denied to the Father as he watches from the sidelines, albeit very close to the action.
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