Wednesday, December 31, 2003 |
The socks and sandals made me do it?
Once again, socks and sandals show themselves to be the source of all evil.
As reported in the Sydney Morning Herald today, a Father and Son team has plotted to kill the girl the son is accused of raping.
If you have a careful look at the TV footage of the Father being led into Parramatta Police Station, you will see that he is indeed wearing socks and sandals.
The Father has been charged with solicitation to murder, carrying a maximum penalty of 25 years and also the charge of mixing wollen socks with open toed leather footwear. The latter charge carrying a maximum penalty of a visit from 5 Gay Americans and a TV crew.
Once again, socks and sandals show themselves to be the source of all evil.
As reported in the Sydney Morning Herald today, a Father and Son team has plotted to kill the girl the son is accused of raping.
If you have a careful look at the TV footage of the Father being led into Parramatta Police Station, you will see that he is indeed wearing socks and sandals.
The Father has been charged with solicitation to murder, carrying a maximum penalty of 25 years and also the charge of mixing wollen socks with open toed leather footwear. The latter charge carrying a maximum penalty of a visit from 5 Gay Americans and a TV crew.
Wednesday, December 24, 2003 |
Christmas Eve Office Bludging
One of the draw backs of being a House Husband is that you don't get to indulge in the annual Christmas Eve Bludging at the office followed by some office cricket and an early exit after a liquid lunch.
Sadly I don't get t leave at lunch time with 4 beers already under the belt unless I want a visit from the Dept of Community Services.
Still, having to be in the office only 2 days per week more than makes up for it.
One of the draw backs of being a House Husband is that you don't get to indulge in the annual Christmas Eve Bludging at the office followed by some office cricket and an early exit after a liquid lunch.
Sadly I don't get t leave at lunch time with 4 beers already under the belt unless I want a visit from the Dept of Community Services.
Still, having to be in the office only 2 days per week more than makes up for it.
Sunday, December 21, 2003 |
Carols by Product Positioning
In Australia every Christmas, there are two major televised Christmas Carol events.
The first one is always Carols in the Domain which is in Sydney. The second is Carols by Candlelight being held in Melbourne on Christmas Eve.
Last night saw the Sydney version go ahead and I'm sure much to the delight of Melbournians, it rained all over every candle holding caroller there.
I have always loved Christmas time and now having kids to share it with makes it even better. I can't wait until they open their presents so "they" can play with them.
Try this little test on yourself. When you think of Christmas carols, what images come into your head? For most people it will be Santa, Snow and the whole White Christmas story. Very few people would picture anything religious.
After all Christmas is mostly about kids and in the competition between baby Jesus and Santa Claus, who do you think is going to win? In the eyes of a child, Jesus may have died for their sins and guaranteed them a life ever lasting, but what have you done for me lately?
Last night however, Carols in the Domain introduced a forth type of Christmas carol. Instead of sticking to the big three, Jesus, Santa and Snow, Channel Seven brought in the Advertising carol. In fact they brought in an entire segment of them sponsored by Disney. What's worse is that they were not even vaguely disguised or dressed up as anything to do with Christmas. They were simply a whole lot of songs from animated Disney movies that had just been released on DVD.
In between these paid for by Disney "carols", Cameron Daddo and the women from Harry's Practice was doing his best to plug the recently release family movie Cheaper by the Dozen, some other up and coming Channel Seven show or just trying to drop the phrase "Channel Seven" in as much as possible.
I can handle singing about snow in weather that is hot enough to melt the nose off Michael Jackson's face but the Lion King has no place anywhere near a Santa hat.
In Australia every Christmas, there are two major televised Christmas Carol events.
The first one is always Carols in the Domain which is in Sydney. The second is Carols by Candlelight being held in Melbourne on Christmas Eve.
Last night saw the Sydney version go ahead and I'm sure much to the delight of Melbournians, it rained all over every candle holding caroller there.
I have always loved Christmas time and now having kids to share it with makes it even better. I can't wait until they open their presents so "they" can play with them.
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I find however that this time of year is an interesting barometer on how much we are influenced by American culture. As tens of thousands of people sat in the rain singing I'm dreaming of a white Christmas, the temperature that day climbed to around thirty degrees Celsius with the previous day hitting highs of thirty four.
Mean while hundreds of thousands of people watching the event from home sat in front of Christmas trees decorated with snowmen, flocked with fake snow and peer out their front windows at the neighbour's Christmas lights set up to represent icicles hanging from the roof or balcony. Not that there is anything wrong with all that really. It's now a firmly entrenched part of a typical Australian Christmas to celebrate these things. This is similar to the way we sing religious Christmas carols without even thinking of their meaning. Most carols we sing are about the birth of Jesus Christ which is the original and for an ever shrinking minority of people, the main theme of Christmas. |
Try this little test on yourself. When you think of Christmas carols, what images come into your head? For most people it will be Santa, Snow and the whole White Christmas story. Very few people would picture anything religious.
After all Christmas is mostly about kids and in the competition between baby Jesus and Santa Claus, who do you think is going to win? In the eyes of a child, Jesus may have died for their sins and guaranteed them a life ever lasting, but what have you done for me lately?
Last night however, Carols in the Domain introduced a forth type of Christmas carol. Instead of sticking to the big three, Jesus, Santa and Snow, Channel Seven brought in the Advertising carol. In fact they brought in an entire segment of them sponsored by Disney. What's worse is that they were not even vaguely disguised or dressed up as anything to do with Christmas. They were simply a whole lot of songs from animated Disney movies that had just been released on DVD.
In between these paid for by Disney "carols", Cameron Daddo and the women from Harry's Practice was doing his best to plug the recently release family movie Cheaper by the Dozen, some other up and coming Channel Seven show or just trying to drop the phrase "Channel Seven" in as much as possible.
I can handle singing about snow in weather that is hot enough to melt the nose off Michael Jackson's face but the Lion King has no place anywhere near a Santa hat.
Saturday, December 20, 2003 |
The best problem I have ever had
Yesterday I had the day to myself.
No Kids to look after, no Wife to look after, a car offering me total freedom and 34 degrees Celsius of Sunny Sydney Weather.
This circumstance confronted me with two choices. To go and do the weekend's shopping a day early and so avoid what would surely be an enormous battle amongst all those who have left their Christmas Shopping to the last weekend, or go to the beach.
There's no prize for guessing who won.
30 mins later I was slowly cruising the streets of Manly in my car looking for a car space like Hugh Grant down Hollywood Boulevard. Both looking for an empty space we could fill, but the one I found only cost me five dollars an hour.
Like most guys, I really hate paying for it but when you can't get anything else, you just have to.
As I looked for a spot to put my things down, I found that I was forced to choose to sit next to either a group of five barley clad school girls or a group of six barley clad school girls. All the guys had taken the high ground so as to gain a better position from which to leer.
This then became my worry. I was the only person on the entire beach over twenty years old (presumably because everyone post twenty was at work) and the beach was so overly crowded that I could not turn my head any whcih way, that did not have me looking directly at the scantily clothed body of a seventeen year old girl.
While I suppose if you could choose which problems you were faced with in life, this would be right up there with being forced to choose between a red or black Ferrari. My worry was however that I might look like some dirty old bloke leering at all the young girls as they paraded around in front of all the guys they were there with.
My solution to this was to hit the water. This as it turned out was not much better as the space between the flags was quite small due to the rough surf. This crowed everyone in so much so that it was getting difficult to move around in the ocean without knocking into anyone.
This being the case I made my way out past the breakers where I found a lot of other guys all facing back towards the beach instead of facing the ocean as is customary at the beach. As the next set of big rollers came in I saw why they were facing the way they were.
A combination of big waves breaking in shallow water, a general lack of surf skills in the girls and their close proximity to each other meant that they could not duck under most of the waves. This meant, as most girls who go to the beach will tell you, if you decide to go up over a big wave, your bikini top will decide to go down. Hence the row of guys all facing the beach.
So after spending about 2 hours in the water I decided to go home.
Got to the car, paid for my parking and drove home where once again, my problems were deciding wether to put a load of dark washing on first or the light coloured washing.
Yesterday I had the day to myself.
No Kids to look after, no Wife to look after, a car offering me total freedom and 34 degrees Celsius of Sunny Sydney Weather.
This circumstance confronted me with two choices. To go and do the weekend's shopping a day early and so avoid what would surely be an enormous battle amongst all those who have left their Christmas Shopping to the last weekend, or go to the beach.
There's no prize for guessing who won.
30 mins later I was slowly cruising the streets of Manly in my car looking for a car space like Hugh Grant down Hollywood Boulevard. Both looking for an empty space we could fill, but the one I found only cost me five dollars an hour.
Like most guys, I really hate paying for it but when you can't get anything else, you just have to.
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Walking up the Corso and arriving at the beach was like something out of the Twilight Zone combined with one of those American T & A movies. It seemed to me as I walked across the sand that I was the only one there over twenty.
It was the first day of Christmas School Holidays and the very hot weather had seemingly attracted every High School kid in Sydney to Manly beach. What's more, it looked as though they were having a competition to see who could wear the least amount of material on their body without exposing anything that under normal circumstances would only been seen when showering or in a strangers bedroom at a drunken end of year party. |
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As I looked for a spot to put my things down, I found that I was forced to choose to sit next to either a group of five barley clad school girls or a group of six barley clad school girls. All the guys had taken the high ground so as to gain a better position from which to leer.
This then became my worry. I was the only person on the entire beach over twenty years old (presumably because everyone post twenty was at work) and the beach was so overly crowded that I could not turn my head any whcih way, that did not have me looking directly at the scantily clothed body of a seventeen year old girl.
While I suppose if you could choose which problems you were faced with in life, this would be right up there with being forced to choose between a red or black Ferrari. My worry was however that I might look like some dirty old bloke leering at all the young girls as they paraded around in front of all the guys they were there with.
My solution to this was to hit the water. This as it turned out was not much better as the space between the flags was quite small due to the rough surf. This crowed everyone in so much so that it was getting difficult to move around in the ocean without knocking into anyone.
This being the case I made my way out past the breakers where I found a lot of other guys all facing back towards the beach instead of facing the ocean as is customary at the beach. As the next set of big rollers came in I saw why they were facing the way they were.
A combination of big waves breaking in shallow water, a general lack of surf skills in the girls and their close proximity to each other meant that they could not duck under most of the waves. This meant, as most girls who go to the beach will tell you, if you decide to go up over a big wave, your bikini top will decide to go down. Hence the row of guys all facing the beach.
So after spending about 2 hours in the water I decided to go home.
Got to the car, paid for my parking and drove home where once again, my problems were deciding wether to put a load of dark washing on first or the light coloured washing.
Wednesday, December 17, 2003 |
Having problems keeping your prison wife happy?
Have you ever been in the embarrassing situation where your crew has the new guy stripped and held down in his cell but you could not perform because of all the smuggled in steroids you took the day before?
Have you ever been in the embarrassing situation where your crew has the new guy stripped and held down in his cell but you could not perform because of all the smuggled in steroids you took the day before?
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Don't worry, the Danish Prison System has you covered.
It seems that for some time now, it has been the practice of the Danish Prison Bosses to hand out Viagra free of charge to inmates who needed it. In a blow to the erectile challenged of the prison population however, their Justice Minister Lene Espersen has put a stop to it. Lene the party pooper says; "If inmates want Viagra to be administered to them by the prison doctor they must pay for it themselves like every other citizen on the outside." Apparently it is most used by Motorcycle Gangs Members because all the steroids they use have made them impotent. |
Friday, December 12, 2003 |
Childbirth from the Father's perspective Part II
Going through 9 months of pregnancy is sometimes very stressful on the Mother however it can also be very taxing on the Father to be.
Your role during those 40 weeks will go from the heady heights of Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver.
Then comes the big day. For some, it will arrive quite suddenly with the sudden "breaking of water" and the onset of contractions in the most unlikely place (I know someone who had this happen to them at the movies). Others will have to endure many drawn out days of false contractions, real contractions that start and then stop again together with many fruitless trips to the hospital only to be told that the best thing is to go home and come back when they are 5 mins apart.
So you've both spent the day sitting on the lounge with a stopwatch counting the minutes between contractions and finally the duration drops to five minutes. Time to waddle her into the car and get down to the hospital.
With a bit of luck you will be placed straight into delivery suite and so begins the final phase of the journey along with more than a few shocks for the Father.
It starts with the mother disrobing and putting on one of the good ol' hospital gowns that shows your ass when ever you walk anywhere. What happens next however will make you forget about your wife’s exposed bum quicker than Shane Warne can SMS a text message to a bar maid.
In will come the Mid Wife, up will go your wife's hospital gown followed quickly by the dreadful snap of latex gloves, a quick squirt of KY and the disappearance of two of the Mid Wife's fingers.
When you witness this for the first time, your chin may suffer some bruising after it hits the floor but let me tell you mate, you better get used to it pretty quickly as your little darling of a wife is going to have more men and women poking, prodding, inserting and viewing the business end in one day than you could possibly imagine.
The rest of the will day will pretty much proceed like a one day cricket match. About ten hours of boredom accentuated by the occasional excitement with the last 45 mins making all the difference.
These last 45 mins (sometimes it's actually hours and hours) will be some of the scariest you will ever experience. Concern for your wife and your unborn baby will consume you totally as you witness the intense pain she goes through and listen to the medical jargon being thrown around by everyone present.
Then you will see it. A natural birth will deliver the father a special gift. The privilege of being the first person to see your child. When you first see their little head is when it all starts to get really exciting (although to the mother it does not feel so little at the time). It is also the time when it can get very scary as it is the point in which the baby is under the most stress and the calls of the medical personal can be very worrying.
In my case it was especially worrying as both our boys experienced very rapid heart rates in this phase and both required resuscitation when they came out with the second actually having the cord wrapped around his little neck. Instead of a little pink thing screaming and wriggling I saw a purple barely moving body. My wife was not able to see it all having just given birth to a ten pound boy and the placenta still to come out but I watched on helpless as doctors and nurses rushed into the room with all sorts of devices and instruments in an attempt to breath life into him.
After a minute or two he started breathing and let out the most beautiful sound a parent can ever hear. His first cry. They brought him over to my wife and everything was fine.
For anyone who has not witnessed a birth in person, I will give you one word. Messy. It may seem strange but your average guy has seen what lay between a women’s legs many more times than a women and therefore has a certain picture of what things usually look like. This may change for you when you witness that object fulfilling its true purpose. It’s a stark contrast from the image you may hold of your wife or from that perfectly trimmed picture of a porn star that someone has sent around the office at work (or so my friends tell me).
After it's all over you will look upon your wife with a new respect but what about sex in the future? You may have trouble getting that image out of your mind and possibly even worry about it affecting your ability to perform. Rest assured that the 6 weeks or longer that you have to wait will more than take care of that.
Going through 9 months of pregnancy is sometimes very stressful on the Mother however it can also be very taxing on the Father to be.
Your role during those 40 weeks will go from the heady heights of Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver.
Then comes the big day. For some, it will arrive quite suddenly with the sudden "breaking of water" and the onset of contractions in the most unlikely place (I know someone who had this happen to them at the movies). Others will have to endure many drawn out days of false contractions, real contractions that start and then stop again together with many fruitless trips to the hospital only to be told that the best thing is to go home and come back when they are 5 mins apart.
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The first time you both have to go through this is usually the hardest as you won't know if the contractions are real, fake or just a result of a dodgy vindaloo from the night before.
This is especially true for the father as he can't feel anything except for the bruises in his hand if he has been unfortunate enough be holding the mother's hand while she has a contraction. Merely witnessing the effects of these painful spasms having no real idea of what they are like, is the beginning of what will be a day full of fear, excitement, embarrassment and sheer joy. |
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So you've both spent the day sitting on the lounge with a stopwatch counting the minutes between contractions and finally the duration drops to five minutes. Time to waddle her into the car and get down to the hospital.
With a bit of luck you will be placed straight into delivery suite and so begins the final phase of the journey along with more than a few shocks for the Father.
It starts with the mother disrobing and putting on one of the good ol' hospital gowns that shows your ass when ever you walk anywhere. What happens next however will make you forget about your wife’s exposed bum quicker than Shane Warne can SMS a text message to a bar maid.
In will come the Mid Wife, up will go your wife's hospital gown followed quickly by the dreadful snap of latex gloves, a quick squirt of KY and the disappearance of two of the Mid Wife's fingers.
When you witness this for the first time, your chin may suffer some bruising after it hits the floor but let me tell you mate, you better get used to it pretty quickly as your little darling of a wife is going to have more men and women poking, prodding, inserting and viewing the business end in one day than you could possibly imagine.
The rest of the will day will pretty much proceed like a one day cricket match. About ten hours of boredom accentuated by the occasional excitement with the last 45 mins making all the difference.
These last 45 mins (sometimes it's actually hours and hours) will be some of the scariest you will ever experience. Concern for your wife and your unborn baby will consume you totally as you witness the intense pain she goes through and listen to the medical jargon being thrown around by everyone present.
Then you will see it. A natural birth will deliver the father a special gift. The privilege of being the first person to see your child. When you first see their little head is when it all starts to get really exciting (although to the mother it does not feel so little at the time). It is also the time when it can get very scary as it is the point in which the baby is under the most stress and the calls of the medical personal can be very worrying.
In my case it was especially worrying as both our boys experienced very rapid heart rates in this phase and both required resuscitation when they came out with the second actually having the cord wrapped around his little neck. Instead of a little pink thing screaming and wriggling I saw a purple barely moving body. My wife was not able to see it all having just given birth to a ten pound boy and the placenta still to come out but I watched on helpless as doctors and nurses rushed into the room with all sorts of devices and instruments in an attempt to breath life into him.
After a minute or two he started breathing and let out the most beautiful sound a parent can ever hear. His first cry. They brought him over to my wife and everything was fine.
For anyone who has not witnessed a birth in person, I will give you one word. Messy. It may seem strange but your average guy has seen what lay between a women’s legs many more times than a women and therefore has a certain picture of what things usually look like. This may change for you when you witness that object fulfilling its true purpose. It’s a stark contrast from the image you may hold of your wife or from that perfectly trimmed picture of a porn star that someone has sent around the office at work (or so my friends tell me).
After it's all over you will look upon your wife with a new respect but what about sex in the future? You may have trouble getting that image out of your mind and possibly even worry about it affecting your ability to perform. Rest assured that the 6 weeks or longer that you have to wait will more than take care of that.
Wednesday, December 10, 2003 |
Sex and violence in children's TV? You better believe it!
I have mentioned before the push in England to ban Thomas the Tank Engine because of the supposedly traumatising effect it is having on children everywhere.
While of course it is a load of bull that it is traumatising children, if you actually sit down and watch the show with your kids, you will soon see that it is one of the most violent shows on TV.
I know it sounds ridiculous but in reality there are but a few episodes of Thomas the Tank Engine that do not contain the most spectacular train crashes, car crashes, truck crashes, trains crashing into cars and trucks, collapsed cranes and even decapitation inducing helicopter accidents.
For example, last Wednesday saw an episode where a "troublesome truck" maliciously pushed one of the Tank Engines off the side of a cliff to what would have been his certain doom had he been a real living thing.
Thundering to the bottom of the cliff the engine finally slammed into the ground with parts, dirt and debris flying everywhere. Luckily because he is a train and not a person or any other animal he was able to be hauled back up, taken back to the train yards to be repaired and checked over by the Fat Controller.
After being repaired, polished and given the all clear from the Fat Controller, he started to plan his revenge on the "troublesome truck" that pushed him off the cliff.
He made sure that the truck that pushed him off the cliff was right behind him. He then started to leave the station before the truck was ready so it put its breaks on. The engine then went even harder purposely trying to hurt the truck until finally he literally tore the "troublesome truck" in two as if it were drawn and quartered!
Whilst this may look a little worrying to adults, to kids it is great because they do not associate the same sorts of things with these actions as we do. They do not understand what death is and because a lot of the time they are over protected, they don't really grasp the concept of being servery injured.
This is the reason why the are not permanently traumatised by watching. They are able to seperate the show from reality. In fact without the images of rail cars full of passengers being flung down cliffs or "troublesome trucks" causing other major incidents and derailments, it is just a couple of boring model trains going around a track.
They ended up winning the competition of course and Bob offered to walk Wendy home. They got to her front door and it could have been a scene from any first date. The awkward silence, not knowing what to do or say, should they kiss, what would that mean if they did? It was all happening.
Eventually Bob left with no good night kiss. Wendy longingly watched him walk away and the show ended with them falling asleep thinking of each other.
This may sound like I am over exaggerating or reading things into it through an adults eyes. Yes there may be a bit of that but I assure you there is something going on between Bob and Wendy.
My wife thinks that their might be something going on between the writers and they are using the show as a metaphor.
I have mentioned before the push in England to ban Thomas the Tank Engine because of the supposedly traumatising effect it is having on children everywhere.
While of course it is a load of bull that it is traumatising children, if you actually sit down and watch the show with your kids, you will soon see that it is one of the most violent shows on TV.
I know it sounds ridiculous but in reality there are but a few episodes of Thomas the Tank Engine that do not contain the most spectacular train crashes, car crashes, truck crashes, trains crashing into cars and trucks, collapsed cranes and even decapitation inducing helicopter accidents.
For example, last Wednesday saw an episode where a "troublesome truck" maliciously pushed one of the Tank Engines off the side of a cliff to what would have been his certain doom had he been a real living thing.
Thundering to the bottom of the cliff the engine finally slammed into the ground with parts, dirt and debris flying everywhere. Luckily because he is a train and not a person or any other animal he was able to be hauled back up, taken back to the train yards to be repaired and checked over by the Fat Controller.
After being repaired, polished and given the all clear from the Fat Controller, he started to plan his revenge on the "troublesome truck" that pushed him off the cliff.
He made sure that the truck that pushed him off the cliff was right behind him. He then started to leave the station before the truck was ready so it put its breaks on. The engine then went even harder purposely trying to hurt the truck until finally he literally tore the "troublesome truck" in two as if it were drawn and quartered!
Whilst this may look a little worrying to adults, to kids it is great because they do not associate the same sorts of things with these actions as we do. They do not understand what death is and because a lot of the time they are over protected, they don't really grasp the concept of being servery injured.
This is the reason why the are not permanently traumatised by watching. They are able to seperate the show from reality. In fact without the images of rail cars full of passengers being flung down cliffs or "troublesome trucks" causing other major incidents and derailments, it is just a couple of boring model trains going around a track.
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3:25pm may supply a quick 4 min fix of TV violence but wait another 35 mins and you will view sexual tension between two leading characters that would rival Mulder and Scully on the X-Files.
Usually Bob the Builder and his business partner Wendy are a model for a reversal of the stereotypical roles portrayed by men and women on television. Wendy is not afraid to get the work belt on and go thrashing around the country side dangerously leaning out the side of one of their rather animated work vehicles. For the past few week however they have been giving off subtle clues that they might be interested in taking their currently plutonic relationship to the next level. One recent episode saw Bob enter a dancing competition with another women. Wendy was very hurt that Bob did not ask her and began to mope around the house trying to work out why Bob did not like her. Then the woman Bob was to take had to pull out so Wendy quickly volunteered to take her place. |
They ended up winning the competition of course and Bob offered to walk Wendy home. They got to her front door and it could have been a scene from any first date. The awkward silence, not knowing what to do or say, should they kiss, what would that mean if they did? It was all happening.
Eventually Bob left with no good night kiss. Wendy longingly watched him walk away and the show ended with them falling asleep thinking of each other.
This may sound like I am over exaggerating or reading things into it through an adults eyes. Yes there may be a bit of that but I assure you there is something going on between Bob and Wendy.
My wife thinks that their might be something going on between the writers and they are using the show as a metaphor.
Tuesday, December 09, 2003 |
Too lazy to look after you kids at the shops? Why not put them on a dog lead?
Who else cringes when they see some one down the shops with their child on a dog lead?
Every now and then it is possible to see a parent walking along at the shops with a little boy or girl strapped up in a harness that looks exactly the same as the one I use to take my dog for a walk in.
Who else cringes when they see some one down the shops with their child on a dog lead?
Every now and then it is possible to see a parent walking along at the shops with a little boy or girl strapped up in a harness that looks exactly the same as the one I use to take my dog for a walk in.
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The poor child trustingly toddles along oblivious to the totally ridiculous and demeaning situation they are in with the lazy ass either equally oblivious or uncaring. Could anybody really say that when they see this picture, they do not cringe? People use the argument that it makes going to the shops a lot easier when they are able to lead their child around like a dog at the park. To them I say it would be even easier if you just cut their legs off and push them around in a little cart instead. These people obviously have no idea how they look to normal people when they go out in public like this. If anyone who uses these things reads this and wants to get an idea of what they loook like to other people, go and watch an episode of Jerry Springer. When they wheel out the Trailer Freaks and you think "oh my god look at them!" you will have an idea. |
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Saturday, December 06, 2003 |
Down with web site pop ups
It seems more and more that we are experiencing an increasing prevalence of web site pop ups.
These are those annoying little extra windows that pop up when you go to some sites.
Previously these abominations were only used in porn sites, often opening up when you entered or exited them (at least that's what a friend told me any way). Exiting those windows would then trigger another pop up window to fire and so it would go on.
Sadly we are now seeing these evil things being used by main stream sites like The Sydney Morning Herald's web site www.smh.com.au and CNN's site www.cnn.com.
Recently I wrote to The Sydney Morning Herald to complain about their decent into using the same hit generating tactics as the sleazy porn site operators.
It seems that they are basically taking the line that everyone else is doing it so why shouldn't I?
This reasoning is always a bad mistake. Its use can been seen in examples such as the occupation of Europe by Nazi Germany, the temporary popularity of Pauline Hanson's One Nation Party or the disturbing trend of people wearing short sleeve shirts over the top of long sleeves.
Now whilst I would never insinuate that The Sydney Morning Herald supports Nazism or One Nation, I would suggest that doing something wrong (web pop ups are no different than the scourge of spam email) just because everyone else is doing it, does not absolve you of your guilt.
It seems more and more that we are experiencing an increasing prevalence of web site pop ups.
These are those annoying little extra windows that pop up when you go to some sites.
Previously these abominations were only used in porn sites, often opening up when you entered or exited them (at least that's what a friend told me any way). Exiting those windows would then trigger another pop up window to fire and so it would go on.
Sadly we are now seeing these evil things being used by main stream sites like The Sydney Morning Herald's web site www.smh.com.au and CNN's site www.cnn.com.
Recently I wrote to The Sydney Morning Herald to complain about their decent into using the same hit generating tactics as the sleazy porn site operators.
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This is their reply;
From: "SMH Online" Reply-To: smhonline@access.fairfax.com.au Subject: RE: SMH Site Feedback Date: Fri, 5 Dec 2003 16:06:18 +1100 hi actually, they're capped to one per user session. if you go to any US site, they're all over the place. by any standard our pop-ups are modest, we believe. as a measure, we've only had about half a dozen complaints about these over the past few months. as a comparison, if we muck up the crosswords, we can get over 20 emails in a day. regards smh online |
It seems that they are basically taking the line that everyone else is doing it so why shouldn't I?
This reasoning is always a bad mistake. Its use can been seen in examples such as the occupation of Europe by Nazi Germany, the temporary popularity of Pauline Hanson's One Nation Party or the disturbing trend of people wearing short sleeve shirts over the top of long sleeves.
Now whilst I would never insinuate that The Sydney Morning Herald supports Nazism or One Nation, I would suggest that doing something wrong (web pop ups are no different than the scourge of spam email) just because everyone else is doing it, does not absolve you of your guilt.
Thursday, December 04, 2003 |
It has come Full Circle
The other day I realised that the role reversal my wife and I have been undergoing this year is complete.
Suddenly it dawned on me that the we had come full circle and to tell you the truth I could not be happier.
The other day I realised that the role reversal my wife and I have been undergoing this year is complete.
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It used to be that I was the main Bread Winner, working the 8 to 5 shifts in the office, coming home to sometimes do some more from home.
Now I stay at home to wash, clean, bake, sort, dry, scrub and cook while my wife goes off to the coal mines for 9 hours a day. It was not until the other night however that we realised the transformation was complete. It came about with my wife sitting at the computer finishing off something for work. I walked out of the kitchen with a tea towel over my shoulder and began to complain that I had broken a nail. |
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Wednesday, December 03, 2003 |
Pay Day for House Husbands
Truly tomorrow is Pay Day for House Husbands all over Australia.
Being at home for the first Cricket Test of the summer shall make all the washing, cleaning, soaking, scrubbing human faeces and off my hands and bleaching bathrooms all worth while.
I suppose fact that I get to spend time with my kids instead of being in the office is ok too.
While every other bloke (and the very small minority of women who like cricket) will have to be hiding from their boss that they are watching the delayed coverage of www.baggygreen.com.au from their office workstation, I and House Husbands all over Australia will be watching the match live on television.
Bring on the keys in the pitch, bring on Tony Griegg giving Bill Lawry crap about his pigeon fetish and bring on a game where 16 guys stand around in a field for 5 days and still don't get a result.
Truly tomorrow is Pay Day for House Husbands all over Australia.
Being at home for the first Cricket Test of the summer shall make all the washing, cleaning, soaking, scrubbing human faeces and off my hands and bleaching bathrooms all worth while.
I suppose fact that I get to spend time with my kids instead of being in the office is ok too.
While every other bloke (and the very small minority of women who like cricket) will have to be hiding from their boss that they are watching the delayed coverage of www.baggygreen.com.au from their office workstation, I and House Husbands all over Australia will be watching the match live on television.
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Certainly Test Cricket is the perfect accompaniment to staying at home and doing house work. I can watch the first half an hour or so and then tottle off to put some washing on, change someone's nappy, change some bed sheets, stack the dishwasher and check back to see that the only change is 20 extra runs and the accidental humour of Ritchie Beneau and Ian Chappell now occupies the commentary chair. |
Bring on the keys in the pitch, bring on Tony Griegg giving Bill Lawry crap about his pigeon fetish and bring on a game where 16 guys stand around in a field for 5 days and still don't get a result.
