Friday, November 28, 2003 |
Global Warming my ass
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Can someone tell me when the so called "Global Warming" bogey man is going to take form to come and devour us all like so many Nimbin residents would have us believe? This summer brings another Sydney Summer and usually by this time, the electric fans of houses in every suburb should have already been running for many hours, yet for the past 3 days I have had our Gas Heater on and sometimes even the electric blanket. How can the Hippies complain so loudly about Greenhouse gas emissions when their diets of Tofu and Lentils contribute so much to it? Global warming where are you when I need you? |
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Thursday, November 27, 2003 |
Guns for Kids
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Yesterday was my youngest son's 2nd Birthday.
We had a quiet day around the house, just me and the boys, but then without realising it, I found that I had given my youngest boy his first lesson in how to use a gun. Of course it was only a water pistol but the fact remains it is based on something who's sole design purpose is to kill another person. Am I taking this a bit to far? Of course, it's just a water pistol that could not hurt a fly. I doubt the experience will see him embarking on a murderous rampage through the halls of his High School. Even so, I am now left with the memory of teaching my son to aim his gun at his brother and pull the trigger. |
Tuesday, November 25, 2003 |
Accessing your Employee's email is wrong
I've said it before and I'll say it again, It is wrong for a Manager, Supervisor or the even CEO of a company to view anyone's email but their own.
The big problem however is that it is very legal for them to do it when ever, how ever and for what ever reason they like.
Right this second there will be thousands of employees around Australia who's email is currently being viewed with out their knowledge.
You may not know this but you are not the only one who has access to your mailbox at work. Anyone who has System Administrator privileges on your network will have the ability to access, view, delete or even scarier respond to your email without your knowledge. They also have the ability to grant other people access to your mailbox.
How do I know this? I'm a System Administrator myself.
In my role as a System Administrator I will receive multiple requests per week for Managers to access their employee's mailboxes and almost without exception, this access is to be granted without the employee knowing anything about it.
Every time I am forced to do this it sickens me as I see it as a violation of the trust those people put in me to protect their privacy.
There are policies that cover this sort of thing on both my client's side and my side that usually say something along the lines of no one shall have access to anyone else's mailbox unless under direct authority of the CEO or other authority of the company. The still fact remains that if that CEO or other authority so wishes, they can view anyone's email on a whim and read anything they like.
The justification for this is that the company owns the email system and therefore can look at what ever they like. To this I say, does not the company also own the phone system? Imagine the outcry if it were discovered that Managers were tapping their employee's phones and listening to everything they said. How is this different from email?
What can you do about it?
Not much let me tell you. There is one thing that may tip you off to the fact that someone has been accessing your mailbox however.
If someone is reading your email and opens one that you have not yet read yourself, it will be displayed as read when you go in to check your mail. So if you see one that it read but you know you did not read it, then something might be up.
Secondly, you could try asking your System Administrator. I know I would love to advise someone when I have given someone else access to their mailbox but it is too risky for me to do that. Obviously I can’t let them know via email and the phone is risky as someone may over hear it.
The third way you can protect your email privacy is to only use your work email for work email. Set yourself up a Hotmail account. Even your System Administrator can't get into that one and no one but you will be able to read it. The only draw back with this is that you will have to be continually going to www.hotmail.com from your computer and since ALL your web surfing is also logged, your Manager may have issue with you spending so much time on the internet. Some companies will even make it impossible for people to get to the hotmail web site.
Another great way to protect your privacy is to get an Instant Messenger program like MSN or ICQ. I would recommend ICQ as you do not have to install anything on your computer, just run the web version and you don't have to worry about firewalls etc... If you go to http://go.icq.com you can set up an ICQ account and start messaging anyone else who has it. The great thing about Instant messengers is that they do not keep a copy of the messages anywhere so no one can view what you have written. The fact that you are st the web site http://go.icq.com will be logged but none of your messages will be.
If you have any questions on how you can protect your privacy at work just drop me a line.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, It is wrong for a Manager, Supervisor or the even CEO of a company to view anyone's email but their own.
The big problem however is that it is very legal for them to do it when ever, how ever and for what ever reason they like.
Right this second there will be thousands of employees around Australia who's email is currently being viewed with out their knowledge.
You may not know this but you are not the only one who has access to your mailbox at work. Anyone who has System Administrator privileges on your network will have the ability to access, view, delete or even scarier respond to your email without your knowledge. They also have the ability to grant other people access to your mailbox.
How do I know this? I'm a System Administrator myself.
In my role as a System Administrator I will receive multiple requests per week for Managers to access their employee's mailboxes and almost without exception, this access is to be granted without the employee knowing anything about it.
Every time I am forced to do this it sickens me as I see it as a violation of the trust those people put in me to protect their privacy.
There are policies that cover this sort of thing on both my client's side and my side that usually say something along the lines of no one shall have access to anyone else's mailbox unless under direct authority of the CEO or other authority of the company. The still fact remains that if that CEO or other authority so wishes, they can view anyone's email on a whim and read anything they like.
The justification for this is that the company owns the email system and therefore can look at what ever they like. To this I say, does not the company also own the phone system? Imagine the outcry if it were discovered that Managers were tapping their employee's phones and listening to everything they said. How is this different from email?
What can you do about it?
Not much let me tell you. There is one thing that may tip you off to the fact that someone has been accessing your mailbox however.
If someone is reading your email and opens one that you have not yet read yourself, it will be displayed as read when you go in to check your mail. So if you see one that it read but you know you did not read it, then something might be up.
Secondly, you could try asking your System Administrator. I know I would love to advise someone when I have given someone else access to their mailbox but it is too risky for me to do that. Obviously I can’t let them know via email and the phone is risky as someone may over hear it.
The third way you can protect your email privacy is to only use your work email for work email. Set yourself up a Hotmail account. Even your System Administrator can't get into that one and no one but you will be able to read it. The only draw back with this is that you will have to be continually going to www.hotmail.com from your computer and since ALL your web surfing is also logged, your Manager may have issue with you spending so much time on the internet. Some companies will even make it impossible for people to get to the hotmail web site.
Another great way to protect your privacy is to get an Instant Messenger program like MSN or ICQ. I would recommend ICQ as you do not have to install anything on your computer, just run the web version and you don't have to worry about firewalls etc... If you go to http://go.icq.com you can set up an ICQ account and start messaging anyone else who has it. The great thing about Instant messengers is that they do not keep a copy of the messages anywhere so no one can view what you have written. The fact that you are st the web site http://go.icq.com will be logged but none of your messages will be.
If you have any questions on how you can protect your privacy at work just drop me a line.
Friday, November 21, 2003 |
Reunion Wrap up
My 10 year High School reunion was really an excellent time.
I would totally suggest to anyone thinking of not turning up to theirs to think again.
Being in the room with everyone was a bit surreal. It was as if I had gone back in time and was back in the school yard except from one thing. When you talked to people you started to notice the little lines appearing around the eyes, the first hints of grey hairs and for some unlucky buggers the beginings of hair loss.
I spent the entire night thinking how cool it was to see everyone again and the entire next day wondering how many beers I must have had to make me so damn sick.
As I was telling people the next day, the one really weird thing about the night was I don't know if I slept at all that night. I can remember being in bed and feeling sick, tossing and turning desperatley searching for a comfortable position, but I can't remember waking up.
Still, now I can't wait for the 20th.
Also for anyone who is interested, I made my National Radio Debut this past Monday 17th Nov. I appeared on Sydney's 2SER with a feature article in their Discovery program.
If you would like to hear me go to this link and then click on the show for 17th Nov. My piece is on why TV ads seem so loud.
My 10 year High School reunion was really an excellent time.
I would totally suggest to anyone thinking of not turning up to theirs to think again.
Being in the room with everyone was a bit surreal. It was as if I had gone back in time and was back in the school yard except from one thing. When you talked to people you started to notice the little lines appearing around the eyes, the first hints of grey hairs and for some unlucky buggers the beginings of hair loss.
I spent the entire night thinking how cool it was to see everyone again and the entire next day wondering how many beers I must have had to make me so damn sick.
As I was telling people the next day, the one really weird thing about the night was I don't know if I slept at all that night. I can remember being in bed and feeling sick, tossing and turning desperatley searching for a comfortable position, but I can't remember waking up.
Still, now I can't wait for the 20th.
Also for anyone who is interested, I made my National Radio Debut this past Monday 17th Nov. I appeared on Sydney's 2SER with a feature article in their Discovery program.
If you would like to hear me go to this link and then click on the show for 17th Nov. My piece is on why TV ads seem so loud.
Thursday, November 13, 2003 |
Another step towards the cardigan store
This Saturday sees me take one more step towards the cardigan store.
I will be attending my 10 year High School Reunion.
This Saturday sees me take one more step towards the cardigan store.
I will be attending my 10 year High School Reunion.
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"Oh you poor diddums. I just came from my 30th School Reunion!" I hear you say.
Whilst that might be a valid statement, you must remember that no one really wants to turn 30. Then after you are 35 you long for the days when you were 30 and christ 40 is just around the corner. So it goes on until you get past 80 and you start thinking "Christ I really want to reach 85." |
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Wednesday, November 12, 2003 |
Socks and Sandals don't mix
I have mentioned before the disturbing winter trend of women's fashion that is the Ug Boot.
Let us now expose the equally disturbing tendency of men to wear socks and sandals.
There are many things in this world that naturally do not go together. Oil and water, SBS and ratings, alcohol and driving, Jews and Palestinians, The Footy Show and a script writer not attending high school, Cronulla Sharks and the NRL Premiership and finally socks and sandals.
Since then we have seen that every day types of blokes will now happily get around in a pair of black sandals on a warm day. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
The problem lies in that some of these people are parents and that they are dressing their kids in socially unacceptable ways. If we were to see a 4 year old girl walking through a shopping centre in something that looked like it belongs in Cher's costume collection, there would be an outcry. So should there be when toddlers are forced to wear socks and sandals by parents oblivious to the long term effects they are having on their children.
So when you are dressing your kids in the morning ready to go out in public for the day, there are two little letters that mean so much to your childrens future. OR.
It is socks OR sandals not socks AND sandals.
Never before has something so little, meant something so much, to someone so young.
I have mentioned before the disturbing winter trend of women's fashion that is the Ug Boot.
Let us now expose the equally disturbing tendency of men to wear socks and sandals.
There are many things in this world that naturally do not go together. Oil and water, SBS and ratings, alcohol and driving, Jews and Palestinians, The Footy Show and a script writer not attending high school, Cronulla Sharks and the NRL Premiership and finally socks and sandals.
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Now some may argue that it is every consenting adult's right to wear what ever they like. In deed once you turn 18 you can drink a beer, vote for the Greens, get a tattoo and other such silly things that you will regret later. By law you can't do these when you are a minor without the ability to make a proper judgement.
Another aspect of being a minor is that your clothes are often chosen for you. Especially when you are very young. In fact it is the very young that I am becoming concerned about with the alarming prevalence in ridiculous male footwear. It used to be that the only blokes who would wear socks and sandals were over 60. That was in the days before the emergence of the trendy new beach sandals that has now become part of the unofficial uniform of the British Backpacker. |
Since then we have seen that every day types of blokes will now happily get around in a pair of black sandals on a warm day. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
The problem lies in that some of these people are parents and that they are dressing their kids in socially unacceptable ways. If we were to see a 4 year old girl walking through a shopping centre in something that looked like it belongs in Cher's costume collection, there would be an outcry. So should there be when toddlers are forced to wear socks and sandals by parents oblivious to the long term effects they are having on their children.
So when you are dressing your kids in the morning ready to go out in public for the day, there are two little letters that mean so much to your childrens future. OR.
It is socks OR sandals not socks AND sandals.
Never before has something so little, meant something so much, to someone so young.
Tuesday, November 11, 2003 |
Saturday morning shopping tips
Shopping by yourself presents the challenges of impulse buying. Shopping with the family on a Saturday morning however, presents a far greater challenge. The sheer volume of all the other families doing exactly the same thing.
If you are not fortunate enough to have got your act together and shoved everyone out the door before 8:30, you better prepare yourself for a 2hr long grocery shopping ordeal that will see you parking in the next suburb before running down the old and the sick with your trolley for a better position at the checkout.
It was then that one of my boys asked to ride on the front of the trolley. I said OK and then I noticed something wonderful happen. Everywhere we went with my 3 year old hanging off the front of the trolley, people would move right out of our way like someone coming back from the bar with a 5 beer shout or Moses parting the sea.
I thought I was just imaging it so I kept him on there for a while. Lo and behold, everywhere we went it was like we were travelling in the bus lane on the Harbour Bridge while everyone else was stuck in peak hour traffic.
And so it seems that the answer to Saturday morning supermarket congestion lies not in getting up early and avoiding the crowds but rather to stick your first born child on the front of the trolley like a human battering ram.
Shopping by yourself presents the challenges of impulse buying. Shopping with the family on a Saturday morning however, presents a far greater challenge. The sheer volume of all the other families doing exactly the same thing.
If you are not fortunate enough to have got your act together and shoved everyone out the door before 8:30, you better prepare yourself for a 2hr long grocery shopping ordeal that will see you parking in the next suburb before running down the old and the sick with your trolley for a better position at the checkout.
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One of the biggest problems with the Saturday morning supermarket is trying to navigate your way around all the other trolleys, strollers, prams, people and staff.
I experienced this first hand recently along with the rising volume of the kid's whinging, the rising of my blood pressure and the ever present squeak of the trolley wheel. As we turned around from the refrigerator isle, into the veggie section and past the entrance again, I noticed with dismay that the people just kept coming. Cramming into the already impossibly crowed supermarket to create some kind of food filled mosh pit. |
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It was then that one of my boys asked to ride on the front of the trolley. I said OK and then I noticed something wonderful happen. Everywhere we went with my 3 year old hanging off the front of the trolley, people would move right out of our way like someone coming back from the bar with a 5 beer shout or Moses parting the sea.
I thought I was just imaging it so I kept him on there for a while. Lo and behold, everywhere we went it was like we were travelling in the bus lane on the Harbour Bridge while everyone else was stuck in peak hour traffic.
And so it seems that the answer to Saturday morning supermarket congestion lies not in getting up early and avoiding the crowds but rather to stick your first born child on the front of the trolley like a human battering ram.
Monday, November 10, 2003 |
So where are the kids?
Get ready to hear this phrase about a million times every time you go out after having kids.
It will even happen if you are there by yourself while your partner is actually at home looking after the kids. The first time you go anywhere after having kids you will be confronted by this question by every single person you know at the party (or which ever function you are attending). They will even ask this before asking after yourself. I even experience it when I run into someone down the shops.
This will deliver the person into a brief state of shock. Their face will go blank and their jaw will drop to the floor in disbelief until they realise that you are in fact joking (and you better be!!!!!).
At all functions and parties you see this person from now onwards, you will have immunity from this well meaning but slightly accusing question.
Then simply repeat for every other person you know at the party and you will be set. If questions persist, threaten them with babysitting duty for the next time you go out. That'll shut them up real quick.
Get ready to hear this phrase about a million times every time you go out after having kids.
It will even happen if you are there by yourself while your partner is actually at home looking after the kids. The first time you go anywhere after having kids you will be confronted by this question by every single person you know at the party (or which ever function you are attending). They will even ask this before asking after yourself. I even experience it when I run into someone down the shops.
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There is a solution however.
Whilst you can never fully escape this ordeal, I have a tip for anyone currently experiencing it that will at least reduce its occurrence in the future. When ever you turn up at a friends party without your kids and the inevitable question is asked "So where are the kids?" or it's variant, "So who is looking after the kids?", just tell them this with the straightest face you can muster, "Oh they're in the car. Don't worry their ok, I left the window down a few centimetres to let the air in." |
This will deliver the person into a brief state of shock. Their face will go blank and their jaw will drop to the floor in disbelief until they realise that you are in fact joking (and you better be!!!!!).
At all functions and parties you see this person from now onwards, you will have immunity from this well meaning but slightly accusing question.
Then simply repeat for every other person you know at the party and you will be set. If questions persist, threaten them with babysitting duty for the next time you go out. That'll shut them up real quick.
Friday, November 07, 2003 |
Go Go Gadget Phone...
It appears the Brains Trust in Japan has finally stopped work on the development of vending machines for schoolgirl's panties and ways to dress up cops in mini skirts to begin work on the Inspector Gadget phone.
In other news the under funded fight against cancer continues.
It appears the Brains Trust in Japan has finally stopped work on the development of vending machines for schoolgirl's panties and ways to dress up cops in mini skirts to begin work on the Inspector Gadget phone.
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Apparently DoCoMo the largest Mobile phone company in Japan has created a phone that is worn on the wrist with the ear piece actually being your index finger.
To answer a ringing Finger Whisper phone, or to initiate and end phone calls, the user simply touches forefinger to thumb and then puts their forefinger in their ear. Electronics in the wristband convert sound waves into vibrations, which are carried through the bones of the hand to the ear so that the Finger Whisper user can hear the other caller. With bones transmitting sound vibrations better than air, the sound quality is expected to surpass a conventional cellphone and should easily drown out noisy surroundings. A microphone in the wristband replaces the cellphone's usual mouthpiece, and instead of dialling a number, the user says it out loud. Voice recognition technology turns the command into a dialled number. |
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In other news the under funded fight against cancer continues.
Wednesday, November 05, 2003 |
Childbirth from the Father’s perspective Part I
It is said that to give birth is similar to sucking a watermelon through a straw. Certainly having witnessed it twice, I would have to admit that it looks just as strikingly difficult and messy not to mention painful.
Little is mentioned however of the Father’s role in the whole process. Indeed while the Father has only a relatively brief physical contribution to the start of the process (some women would say all too brief), he is still very much involved in many other ways throughout the entire time.
Whilst I would never suggest that the Father would go through the sorts of physical pain, suffering and stress that the Mother obviously goes through, there are none the less a number of anxieties and traumas that a Father to be may go through during the pregnancy and finally the delivery.
For instance, you will witness a dramatic physical change in your wife during the term of the pregnancy that will see her start off like this;
Another unforseen and little talked about roller coaster ride is the actual “trying for a baby”. For most couples this phrase is very apt. All but the very lucky (or in some unfortunate circumstances the very unlucky) fall pregnant with a “Silver Bullet” within he first month of trying. It will usually take many months or in some cases years to fall pregnant.
I was visiting a mate one day who had gone through all of this twice already. When I told him that we were trying for a baby he said to me “Enjoy it while it lasts you lucky bastard”. We exchanged a knowing grin but little did I know that his was a little more knowing than mine.
Assuming that most readers have already learnt how to “make babies” from their parents, the school yard, personal experience or watching Video Hits of a Saturday morning, I will simply say that the process requires a lot of making. In fact with no kids around and the house to yourselves, you will be surprised how many times you will be hauled into the bedroom by your ovulating wife like a Stud Pony for a servicing.
And so it goes on until one day after a few mornings of copious vomiting, your wife brings you the news you have both been waiting for lo those many unprotected sex filled months. A swizzle stick lying in a cup of her urine says she is pregnant.
In the space of one day you will fall from the heady heights of your role as Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver. For she will need it. A woman’s body becomes a hormonal wreck after falling pregnant with the very last thing on her mind being “making babies”.
Undeniably the Father to be will be called upon to provide many comforts for her that range anywhere from a relaxing foot massage or back rub to convincing her that she is not becoming fat but rather radiantly pregnant no matter how large and unattractive her clothes have now become.
Whilst the Mother undoubtedly draws the worst feelings of despair, pain and suffering during her pregnancy, she also is able to experience all of the incredibly positive experiences as well. The feeling that another human being is growing inside you, being nurtured by you until it comes into the world. This feeling is denied to the Father as he watches from the sidelines, albeit very close to the action.
It is said that to give birth is similar to sucking a watermelon through a straw. Certainly having witnessed it twice, I would have to admit that it looks just as strikingly difficult and messy not to mention painful.
Little is mentioned however of the Father’s role in the whole process. Indeed while the Father has only a relatively brief physical contribution to the start of the process (some women would say all too brief), he is still very much involved in many other ways throughout the entire time.
Whilst I would never suggest that the Father would go through the sorts of physical pain, suffering and stress that the Mother obviously goes through, there are none the less a number of anxieties and traumas that a Father to be may go through during the pregnancy and finally the delivery.
For instance, you will witness a dramatic physical change in your wife during the term of the pregnancy that will see her start off like this;
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and finish off the process something like this
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Another unforseen and little talked about roller coaster ride is the actual “trying for a baby”. For most couples this phrase is very apt. All but the very lucky (or in some unfortunate circumstances the very unlucky) fall pregnant with a “Silver Bullet” within he first month of trying. It will usually take many months or in some cases years to fall pregnant.
I was visiting a mate one day who had gone through all of this twice already. When I told him that we were trying for a baby he said to me “Enjoy it while it lasts you lucky bastard”. We exchanged a knowing grin but little did I know that his was a little more knowing than mine.
Assuming that most readers have already learnt how to “make babies” from their parents, the school yard, personal experience or watching Video Hits of a Saturday morning, I will simply say that the process requires a lot of making. In fact with no kids around and the house to yourselves, you will be surprised how many times you will be hauled into the bedroom by your ovulating wife like a Stud Pony for a servicing.
And so it goes on until one day after a few mornings of copious vomiting, your wife brings you the news you have both been waiting for lo those many unprotected sex filled months. A swizzle stick lying in a cup of her urine says she is pregnant.
In the space of one day you will fall from the heady heights of your role as Stud Pony Extraordinaire, to take on the job of Nurse, Cook, Cleaner and general support giver. For she will need it. A woman’s body becomes a hormonal wreck after falling pregnant with the very last thing on her mind being “making babies”.
Undeniably the Father to be will be called upon to provide many comforts for her that range anywhere from a relaxing foot massage or back rub to convincing her that she is not becoming fat but rather radiantly pregnant no matter how large and unattractive her clothes have now become.
Whilst the Mother undoubtedly draws the worst feelings of despair, pain and suffering during her pregnancy, she also is able to experience all of the incredibly positive experiences as well. The feeling that another human being is growing inside you, being nurtured by you until it comes into the world. This feeling is denied to the Father as he watches from the sidelines, albeit very close to the action.
